Read Books

Some books I've read (or listened to) lately that I recommend, roughly sorted by their impact on my memory:

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People - Stephen R. Covey
Never Split The Difference - Chris Voss
The Goal - Eliyahu M. Goldratt
Naked Economics - Charles Wheelan
Multipliers - Liz Wiseman
Principles - Ray Dalio
Leaders Eat Last - Simon Sinek
The Lessons of History - Will Durant
Crucial Conversations - Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny
The 4-Hour Workweek - Timothy Ferriss
The Personal MBA - Josh Kaufman
The Power of Now - Eckhart Tolle
Deep Work - Cal Newport
Man's Search For Meaning - Viktor Frankl
The Anatomy of Peace - The Arbinger Institute
Devil In The White City - Erik Larson
Wealth and Wisdom (Autobiography) - Benjamin Franklin
High Output Management - Andrew Grove
The Alchemist - Paulo Coelho

I have read these in roughly the last year, and plan on reading most of them again, as I find I typically have to do that to remember clearly.

So... why does it matter? I am not trying to humble brag, or prove that I am smart. Most days I feel very not smart. Many days I feel hardly better than dumb. I'm reading these books so I can try to be a little smarter.

I am posting this list because I meticulously created it from listening to successful, famous, or wealthy people that recommended them. Many of these recommendations came via the wonderful Tim Ferriss Podcast. A few came as vigorous suggestions from close friends I respect.

These books came highly recommended, they are helping me to build strong mental models of the world and its systems, and now I am recommending them to you.

Build Mental Models

Our mental models of the world are the frameworks of knowledge we use to understand things and make decisions.

For example, when you are having a conversation, your mental model of what makes one a good conversationalist will drive your part. If you have no mental model for this situation, or if your mental model is weak, you will likely make mistakes, faux pas, or unforced errors.

To expand on this example, my mental model for conversations is roughly:

Listen more than you talk, let the other person do the majority of the talking.
To encourage your partner to speak, ask questions about things that interest them.
Show a genuine interest as your partner is talking. Use eye contact, nods, and mirroring comments.
To avoid your mind wandering as you are listening, pay attention and occasionally summarize or "label" what a person is saying. Listening like this can prevent the mind from drifting away, and when you summarize someone's point of view, you are communicating that you are paying attention. It's also a way to build trust.
Smile. Be real. Let that person know you care about them.

There are more, but this gives the idea. I'm sure you've met many people that do not have a good mental model of how to be a good conversationalist. They talk only of themselves, they don't listen, and they are mostly dreadful and boring to speak with.

I've been working for several years to try to be someone that people want to talk to, and enjoy being around. It's been mostly effective, although I find that sometimes I can think too hard and become quite wooden and stiff because I'm in my own head. Practice makes perfect, I guess.

So, that's a mental model for holding conversations. And there are many more I'm working on building:

Economics and finance
Software engineering
Interpersonal Relationships
Management and Leadership
Music (Guitar, Piano, Voice)

Even though I usually don't feel so smart, there are times when I find myself leaning on these mental models, and making better decisions because of it. These books have made me a slightly better thinker, and any progress in the right direction is a great thing.

The Takeaway

So with that, I encourage you to go out and read books, or read more books, and maybe one of these books. Little by little, build your mental models and see how much they can assist you in your day to day life.